Are we free to choose our own path in life?
The Thought Process
Have you ever felt stuck or frustrated in your life? Personally , I’ve been lucky enough to have some wonderful experiences, but I’ve often found myself dreaming of living on a Greek island, working remotely on topics of my choice and at my own pace.
As a Westerner, I was raised with the mantra “If you want to, you can.” Think of the thousands of decisions we make every day. We’re the only ones who decide whether to jump out of bed or hit the snooze button, whether to take a shower or a bath, or whether to become vegetarian, flexitarian, or a meat-eater. Every day, we make thousands of decisions. That said, while appealing, I find the theory of free will a bit too simplistic and oppressive for some people.
What is OUR true decision-making power?
Being free means being free from external constraints that prevent you from doing or saying what you want. For example, I decided to avoid eating meat and to reduce my fish consumption because I wanted to focus on what was within my control in the fight against climate change, while honoring my values of responsibility and citizenship.
Yet some people will tell me that my friends, my reading, and my work influenced this choice. One might indeed wonder whether our actions are influenced more by our environment than by our rational judgment alone. For example, despite the scientific evidence, some people continue to believe that humans are not responsible for climate change.
To what extent do external factors influence our decision-making?
Many thinkers have demonstrated that events are in fact determined by preexisting causes. The sociologist Durkheim explained that our ideas, thoughts, habits, and actions are strongly influenced by the socioeconomic context in which we live.
According to this line of reasoning, I wouldn't be who I am—some might call me a "bobo" enjoying an international career—without my family's social background, values, and network, among other factors.
I'm sure my background has had a strong influence on my current circumstances. But is everything already predetermined? Are we blind or naive in the choices we make?
What if the path TO freedom depended on our ability to perceive?
Rather than viewing humans as automatons or as all-powerful beings, Freud introduced a third way of thinking with his concepts of the “ego,” “id,” and “superego.” These interacting agents—representing our conscious, unconscious, and subconscious minds—are shaped by our environment, social norms, inner thoughts, drives, and desires. Fundamentally, we are confronted with multiple sources of influence—both intrinsic and extrinsic—as we go about our lives.
To put it (very) simply, through psychoanalysis, we can acknowledge our power and responsibility by bringing our unconscious thought patterns into consciousness. By doing so , we can free ourselves from our limiting beliefs.
Would accepting our determinants increase our freedom?
Having the willingness to recognize and detach ourselves from our internal and external determinants can give us some control over shaping our future. We can change our mindset regarding our circumstances. We can allow ourselves to imagine the future on our own terms and trust our intuition. Yes, it can seem exhausting. Personally, I don’t always succeed. But it’s worth trying because, when it works, the world seems to radiate light and joy!
For the philosopher Descartes, true freedom is achieved when our will and our intellect (unlimited capacity vs. limited capacity) are harmoniously aligned. This premise gives me pause. Is freedom a matter of balance? A balance between accepting our roots as our inner determinants while freely creating our future possibilities; a balance between our physical limitations and our boundless imagination; a balance between our expectations and our trust in the unknown. One opposite nourishing the other to create a liberating fusion.
The Path to Change
THE TOOL
Do you want the freedom to choose your own path in life? It might be a good idea to start by understanding your deepest motivations and potential obstacles, and then align your actions with your expectations.
Easier said than done. I know! Here’s a tip to help you get started: kids’ favorite (and revamped) game… the “Why” game?!
First, think about what you want: “I’d like X”
Next, dig deeper to uncover the underlying need. Ask yourself, “What does X tell me about what’s important to me? I need Y. Okay, what does Y tell me about what’s important to me?” And so on, until nothing more comes to mind.
Finally, go back to the source—to your original desire—to assess how that need might influence your behavior in the future.
THE CASE STUDY
Let’s take the example of a social entrepreneur who wants to recruit women to her organization’s board of directors but is facing resistance from the company’s founders. A conversation with a coach might go something like this:
What does this desire to appoint women to the board of directors say about what is important to you?
Well, it's obvious: equality. And besides, I'm angry because it's clearly not recognized and…
Okay, let's focus a little on this idea, if you don't mind. What does equality give you that's even more important?
Well, recognizing the power of diversity.
And what does this recognition give you that is even more valuable?
Hmm… acceptance of all human beings, no matter who they are. Nothing is more important than that, don't you think?
When you are fully accepted, what changes for you?
I recognize who I am and no longer need external validation. I embrace my own differences and those of others as a gift and an asset.
And how does this shift in perception help you in your lobbying efforts to get more women on the board of directors?
Well, women shouldn't be represented just because they're women. We simply need to find a diverse group of people who will enrich the debate and decision-making process at the board level. So women, yes—but not just anyone, and not only women. In fact, I need to find the talent and experience we’re lacking. If the founders understand the value of having a diverse group of people in our startup, we shouldn’t have to fight for it anymore.
The MANTRA
"Better to correct a mistake than to make none at all."
It comes from Charles Pépin's book *This Is Not a Philosophy Textbook*, which admirably simplifies philosophical concepts without compromising their depth and meaning.
NOW IT'S YOUR TURN!
What decision do you want to make and what experiment do you want to try today?
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Do you want to become the leader you envision for the world you hope to see? Is it time to discover and assert your leadership? Do you want to embed the concepts of positive impact and purpose at the heart of your organization? Is the challenge to accelerate engagement within your ecosystem to drive systemic change?
If your answer is yes and you’d like some guidance along the way, please contact me! Here’s a link to schedule a exploratory session and the form to further explore your goals and challenges.
